Pentagon has zombie apocalypse battle plan

Never fear, the U.S. government has a contingency plan for surviving a zombie apocalypse.

Hidden in a secret computer network is an unclassified document titled “CONOP 8888,” according to an international news publication. This comprehensive plan details strategies for combating various types of zombies, such as “chicken zombies,” which rise after being euthanized by farmers, and “evil magic zombies” created through occult experiments.

The 2012 report instructs U.S. Strategic Command to develop strategies to protect “non-zombie humans” from zombie hordes. But is it real? Well, sort of.

Military planners in Omaha, Nebraska, created a detailed scenario to prepare for a widespread national crisis. They developed a zombie combat strategy that includes training civilians on survival skills in a post-apocalyptic world, such as collecting rainwater, and deploying and withdrawing military personnel.

“The document was created as a training tool during an internal training exercise where students learn about basic military planning principles and apply them in an imaginary scenario,” Navy Capt. Pamela Kunze wrote in a message to the magazine. “This is not a U.S. Strategic Command plan.”

The document includes a disclaimer stating, “this plan was not actually designed as a joke.”

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“Poultry zombies” are considered the most terrifying among the walking dead described in the plan.

So-called “CZs” rise from the carcasses of chickens culled because they no longer produce eggs. The reanimated birds then claw their way to the surface.

“CZs are simply terrifying to behold and are likely only to induce individuals to become vegetarians in protest to animal cruelty,” the document warns.

Other types of zombies mentioned include creatures from outer space, Frankenstein-like scientists creating undead beings, and humans infected by a pathogen spread through a zombie attack.